Where Have All The BFFs Gone?

Ok, let's be honest for a second here.  Being a grown up is not all that it's cracked up to be.  And I'm not talking about the grown-up-because-I'm-in-college-so-I-answer-to-no-one kind of grown up.  Those were the days of staying up all night with  friends, watching episode after episode of Friends and drinking Nips in the circa 1976 radio studio.  Much as I thought I was grown up then, looking back I must admit (wistfully) that I was a mere babe in the woods compared to life as I currently know it.

Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't trade the security I have now, or my wonderful husband and baby daughter for those college days.  I've been through too much to get where I am now, and I'm happy with my life.  But, geez, is it too much to ask to have a little lighthearted fun with the girls every now and again?  It isn't for lack of trying, on all our parts.  We plan, we schedule, we have brilliant ideas for getting together for a night out.  We even tried once (unsuccessfully, do I need to add?) to plan a Girls Only Vacation.  Pffft.  My memory card is sadly lacking pics from that well-intentioned trip.

So what is it that prevents us from following through on all these plans?  Sure, a week's vacation may be raising the bar too high, but one measly little Friday night soiree shouldn't be that bad of a task.  But, sadly, our little schemes never make it past the beginning stages, and so here I sit lamenting days gone by like a blue-hair.  Pass me my bifocals, dear, so I can finish this knitting.

The excuses we make for not getting together are understandable on the surface.  Too much work to do, no babysitter, no money to spend.  And they are all entirely true.  Yet, the REAL reason we can't overcome these obstacles is simply that we are all just TOO TIRED.  We're too busy being supermom, superwife, supergirlfriend, super-independent woman.  We stretch ourselves thin, telling ourselves we have to do it all and do it not only well, but be the best.  So our bodies and our minds are exhausted, and we let one thing slide: our relationships with our closest friends.  Because we take for granted that they will be there, waiting, after all the dishes are done, the lunches packed, the spreadsheets finished.  It's okay if we don't go out this week, we tell ourselves, because Lisa (or Jenny, or Ashley, or Joe) will understand.  Hell, they are all in the same boat.  We reschedule and we whine about not having the time to fit everything in.  This is where we supermoms/wives/girlfriends/independent women are DEAD WRONG.

We do have the time, we just don't use it wisely.  The dishes will still be there, the kids will still love us, and the work is a terrible priority.  So schedule me in your planner, girls, and this time, cancelling is not an option.